It may or may not be common public knowledge at this point that I review adult movies and toys.  Because of this I am considered part of the sex blogging community, albeit I am not a very active member in the respect that I don’t read a ton of blogs from other sex bloggers.  I am also taking the Loveology University Love Coach course because I felt that, doing what I do, that it might be of some use to me.  I also thought that it might open a few doors for me doing freelance writing work.  For anyone curious, it’s a basic background course in human sexuality and relationships and it provides some good information.

Last winter Virginia experienced what has been come to be known as Snowpocolypse and Snowmaggedeon.  The first was a series of two snowstorms/blizzards less than a week apart that dumped three feet of snow on us each time.  The second was another snow storm that arrived just as we were recovering from the first two and proceeded to dump another 4 plus feet of snow on us.  I can’t remember the last time I shoveled that much snow.  To make it worse, we have an asshole neighbor who decided to “help” the city plow our street and dumped all the snow from the street into people’s driveways that they had just dug out, and he buried both fire hydrants on the corner here.  So not only did we have to dig out the drive from the snow, but from the asshole neighbor.  I was also nice and helped our neighbor do some shoveling since he had his stuff to dig out as well as our neighbor lady who is in her 80’s across the street.

I have scoliosis in my back that causes me pain, especially in my right hip.  I also have fibromyalgia.  After a cold winter where I spent a lot of time outside moving snow I came down sick.  I don’t mean sick like with the flu or anything like that.  I had a very hard time getting out of bed.  I was in a lot of pain and I needed at least one nap every day.  I also couldn’t seem to warm up.  I was always freezing to death.  I assumed that winter had just completely kicked my ass.

After a particularly bad month with my cycle back in April I found a new gyno.  I hadn’t been in a number of years because the doctor I was going to keep blowing off my problems.  Upon visiting her I not only got the news I was expecting, that I needed a hysterectomy, but I also found out I had high blood pressure and I needed to go to my regular doctor.  I didn’t have a GP so I set out to find one.  It was determined that my blood pressure was high because of the pain I was in from my fibro that wasn’t being properly managed (I was immediately put on meds for it where I didn’t have to depend on pain meds alone) and I found out I had hyperthyroidism (again, put on meds for it).

Now I was ready for surgery. Being a sex blogger, I had full intentions of blogging about the experience, recovery, adapting to medical menopause and sex.  After all, no one prepares you for the changes of menopause and little is written about sex afterward.  The first problem was, surgery really kicked my ass thanks to the fibro.  During the month following surgery I think I slept more than I was awake.  Getting up out of bed to go to the bathroom was enough to tire me out to need a three hour nap.  I also didn’t eat for a week.  I just didn’t feel up to it.  My husband even brought home Mongolian Beef for me from our local Chinese take out.  When you haven’t eaten in a few days, DO NOT make spicy food the first thing you eat.  Learn from my mistake.

At one point I tried putting together a website/blog about sex and endometriosis.  I sent the site to the endo group I was on and got blasted because it was “inappropriate”.

A bit about my surgery.  Because of my medical history I wasn’t lucky enough to have the hysterectomy done by laproscopically or vaginally.  I was told that she was going to go through my c-section scar.  I found out afterward that it was too low and she had to make a second one.  My uterus was removed along with both ovaries.  The day after surgery I was put on the lowest dose of estrogen possible.

After recovery I was expecting all kinds of changes in sex.  I had read a number of things that said your sex drive decreases, you need lube and a number of other things that made sex challenging.  None of the happened to me.  Everything was exactly the same except the pain.  So much for my ongoing sex-help blogging topic.  I had nothing to talk about.

I also considered at one point blogging about male sexual dysfunction since that has been an ongoing issue as well.  I tried writing about it once for Associated Content.  The article took me a while to write because I wanted to do it without all the butt-hurt feelings I had.  Once it was done they sent me a message saying it was declined because the subject matter was “inappropriate”.  So, we can have adverts on TV talking about ED and advertising Viagra and Cialis but we can’t talk about it?  Must be grand to be a drug company with all the money in the world where you can talk about things that the rest of us can’t, even though it’s a real issue.

While I was going through recovery from surgery my husband went to the GP that I found and discovered that he had some severe vitamin deficiencies that are both genetic and related to his celiac disease.  Once he was treated for those, he became a different person, a much better person to be around and much closer to the man I married than the asshole I had been living with for the last four years.  I suppose that I could write about the problems we had, but it’s no longer something that demands it’s own website.

What I have learned from trying to help by sharing my experiences with sex and various disabilities and challenges is that society in general does not like to have frank open discussions about sex and people are offended about such things.  It’s sad really.  I am in shock that as a society we are still that repressed.

Do not be surprised if I blog about these things occasionally.  These things are and have been a part of my life and I feel my experiences may help someone.  If nothing else it will let them know they aren’t alone.  I decided that this blog might as well become home to those things as well in addition to those other things that I blog about that make up my life.

If anyone wants to ask me questions about any of this or anything else, feel free to use my formspring.  You can do it autonomously from there.

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